Bilirubinometers...

OK, before I get started with this blog, it's been brought to my attention that there might be staff from Coventry University Hospital NICU reading this!!  This is not in itself a problem however you should remember that I am only five weeks old and have yet to fully understand the skills of tact and diplomacy which will hopefully come later in life.  For now however, please do not take offence if I highlight one or two comical moments... it's all done with the best of intentions.  Oh, and for the avoidance of doubt, this is me - Poppy Lola - writing this, so if you're planning to sue for defamation there's not much in the way of assets to go for!  Any suggestion that my Dad is involved in the writing of this blog is pure speculation.

Let's begin with the good news... and there's plenty of it!  Since going on to TPN (the total parentatal nutrition stuff that goes into my arm through the long line) I've really been piling on the pounds.  Well, piling on one pound to be precise!  But get this... I now weigh over three pounds! I'm HUGE! It feels so much better to have a bit of flesh on my little frame.  It seems to make everything so much easier.

Look at that 'long line'!
I cried when that came out!

At first, when I went on to TPN, they reduced my milk intake to 3 mils every hour but over the last week it's been steadily increasing until today I topped out at 9.5 mils per hour!  The Doctors were so pleased with me that my long line finally came out of my arm today (after ten days) so now I'm back to just Mummy milk again.  Can I just say that it hurt like billy oh when they took that line out, so much so in fact that I cried!  I've never cried!  I've sort of whimpered every now and then, but today I cried a proper cry... and Mummy was there and guess what?  She cried too!  Daddy wasn't there but I reckon he'd have blubbed as well... he's such a lightweight!

As soon as the line was out the Doctor (who I shall now not name as she's probably reading this!) announced that I was going to have another blood transfusion so I was going to need another cannula putting in!  Brilliant!  I've lost count of the number of blood transfusions I've had now... I think it's five... but the amazing thing is, they're all from the same person.  Don't ask.  I've no idea how it works, but there's someone out there to whom I owe my life.  All they did was trot into a blood donation centre and donate a pint of blood and I've been sucking it up for five weeks.  I wish they knew!  If you give blood, I'm very happy for you to assume that it's yours I'm using.  This should make you feel good about yourself... and you deserve to!

To be honest, I don't really know what's going on with all this jaundice/bilirubin/red blood cell malarkey.  I know that the bilirubin light doesn't work any more because I'm too old... this is the only thing in the world that I'm too old for!  There's been talk of liver drugs and diuretics and transfusions and all sorts of stuff, but I've lost track of what's supposed to be wrong with me and what they're all doing about it, so for now it's another blood transfusion and hope for the best... more titivation!  For what it's worth, I think I just need to shit more.  So I'll be giving that my best shot over the next few days.

Dad was reading the Times at the weekend and there was an article about jaundice in new-born babies.  It was a bit scary so he threw the paper away before Mum could read it (not sure if this was a good tactic!) but before he did he copied this bit (below).  And if you read it, you will see that there's a machine called a 'bilirubinometer' which should be used at 'every opportunity'.  Now I wouldn't know a bilirubinometer if I fell over one.  Never seen one.  Which is a bit odd given that I would be awarded the 'Baby in Most Need of a Bilirubinometer' at the National Jaundice Awards... if they existed... which they don't!

Dad turned up on Bank Holiday Monday - when there was something of a holiday mood on the ward - with the Times under his arm, and demanded to know why I'd not been put on a bilirubinometer!  He sounded dead knowledgeable and important.  Unfortunately no one on the ward had ever heard of a bilirubinometer but like my dad they all thought it was a great word and everyone agreed that the journalist had done a great job of making it up!

Right, that was a bit of a tangent even for me.  Where was I?  Oh yes, I'm gaining weight nicely and I suppose my breathing is beginning to improve too.  I'm now coming off the C-PAP two times a day and just using the nasal prongs.  With these, I'm more or less breathing for myself but there's a little puff of oxygen under pressure on every breath just to encourage me.  Today I managed to do two five hour sessions just on the nasal prongs!  My Dad has been teaching me the importance of humility but sod it... I was brilliant!  I reckon I might be able to leave that C-PAP thing behind completely soon and who knows, maybe even move out of intensive care and into HDU (High Dependency Unit).  I've not mentioned this before because I though it was tempting fate but I'm giving myself two weeks max to get out of here!

Millie came in to see me again with Dad, who put his phone inside my incubator and took Millie's photo from where I was lying.  The result is a Poppy Lola's Eye view of what it looks like from here.  If you look at this photo and concentrate for a minute you can sort of imagine that you're me.  So far, this is more or less all I've seen... well a series of different faces, but you know what I mean.

Mummy and Daddy often talk about the world outside.  I can't wait to visit all the places they talk about when they're here, especially IKEA, Starbucks and that bloody hospital car park (which they talk about a lot!)  The world sounds like such an amazing place!

Vertical - a whole new perspective!

Nearly time to go to sleep again, so to end tonight's blog here's a picture of me from a new angle.  It's not one of my best (again) but I'm proud of it because:

• I'm vertical
• I only have prongs (no C-Pap!)
• You can see my luxuriant head of hair
• You can't see any other wires or tubes
• The Very Hungry Caterpillar crawled into shot

Hopefully, you'll have sensed my optimism today?   I've missed out a few scary moments - you don't need to know all of the details all the time.  On balance I'd say I'm moving in the right direction and I'm still thinking of my release date on 8th June.  Who knows though, with good behaviour I might be out of here sooner!

Lots of love and hugs!

Poppy Lola xxx

Footnote:  It appears, that the 'bilirubinometer' does in fact exist and has it's own entry in Wikipedia.  Apologies are therefore due to the Times journalist... who probably got his information from Wikipedia anyway!